Do you wish then that the gods had made me poetical?

AUDREY
I do not know what 'poetical' is: is it honest indeed and word? is it a true thing?

Its been fairly interesting time. Once I reached level 71 on Paladin, I sought out to complete my Savage Blade quest. I did join a couple of XP parties, but my heart wasn't truely with it. (There are some days when I spend literally 8 hours of seeking without party and other days, I login, and get an invite in 2 seconds.) And many people still demand to XP only in the new areas on those awful Imps and flys. Those areas are still over camped and require very cut-throat and often dangerous activites.

One day I just log in and I immediatly was begged to join one party that went okay, except for the mathmatician who was offended by the lack of efficiency I already wrote about. He refused to do any skillchain so I had to join in..something I hate doing simply cause I have to spend my time on paladin checking recast timers and counting down when I need to do my next hate event. The white mage in the group was amazinly good.. even tried to recruit her for my godshell. But whats really funny about the area is that every replacement tends to pull in an imp by default..since you can't help but agro them.

Last night I was asked to join a party in the same spot, and there was a red mage in party I had history with. This red mage made a really bad party for the Tree that had only one sleeper when we tried to kill crawlers--herself. Of course.. one pull and she was resisted and died fast; party wipe. Everyone in the party except the two of us left, so we head to Bibiki Bay...after a huge amount of time of doing nothing...and she invited an unpredicable summoner and a monk who wore grear 15-40 levels lower than himself...who was afk the whole time (yes.. I know.. I'm not a "gear monger" but with that bad of gear for a monk...he would have taken huge damage every time he got hate, and monks got hate a lot). Ultimatly.. seeing what kind of setup she made..and the xp leech... I left and solo'd my level. She was not happy about me. WELL.. we went to the new area to XP on Imps. We arrive at camp, but there was an Imp in the way..so I went around it...and she didn't...the party wipse. The RDM who was there came to raise, but she refused a raise 1, but ended up home pointing and disbanding. I know we were in a party between that went okay, but I have no idea what lead to that. In all honesty, I have no hard feelings for this person.. I wouldn't be suprised if she had some for me, but I wish her well.

The person who replaced her was a ninja...and this guy made me wonder if I had yet another person who hated me. Having two tanks is always a question mark, so I sent several tells to see if he wanted to tank full, part time or what not. Not only did I not get any response...the guy didn't respond to anything I said. I never blacklisted the person, so I can only assume.. he either blacklisted me or just plain didn't like me. Hehe.. and the multicoloured idea comes down as to what the heck did I ever do to this person. I'm not even sure if I did anything, but.. its just hard to really care. What can I do but apologize, yet such an apology couldn't be heard.

This in retrospect is interesting for me because I've been on the other side too many times. Blacklisting people is one way to make it easier to deal with things. Someone shouting spams, someone harrassing you on any reason ("Teleport me", "Your shihei are overpriced", etc), or being disrespectful in a sexual, rude, or profane way. And, of course.. in response to an action that might make me angry, like stealing a mob or whatever. I have had to do this on all occasions. A couple times I've had very odd comments that turned out to be a misunderstanding; however, the act of blacklisting this person made them really mad at me and used all sorts of tricks to harrass me. Which was almost a self fulfilling prophecy. I want to believe I did these with justification. Even still, I've given many people a second or third chance.

Well.. whatever will be, I will accept. Things are not cut and dry, but I can try to be honest.